Gerry Ann Tarver Nichol's Obituary
Gerry Ann Tarver Nichol, beloved wife, mother, grandmother, and friend, passed away on July 6, 2019 in Memphis, Tennessee at the age of 78. Her devoted husband, Richard E.M. Nichol, Sr. (Dick), was by her side.Gerry was born on July 24, 1940, to the late Annie Louise and John William Tarver, and grew up in Greenville and Clarksdale, Mississippi, alongside her three younger brothers. Her playmates included her dozens of first cousins whom she adored and kept up with throughout her life. Though Gerry later lived in many other places, and visited far more in her extensive travels, she always identified with her Mississippi Delta roots. Gerry never lost the beautiful southern accent and gracious manner that captivated new friends everywhere she went.There was truly never a goal or experience that Gerry was too cautious to jump into with both feet. As a teenager wishing for a chance to go to summer camp, she decided to apply for a job teaching waterskiing at a girls’ camp in upstate New York — despite not knowing how to operate a ski-boat and barely skiing herself. Gerry got the job, and then spent the few weeks before she left on Lake Ferguson with her younger brothers, learning how to run a boat and slalom. Of course, she was a complete success at camp and got invited back for a second summer.Upon graduating from the University of Mississippi in 1962, Gerry was determined to move to New York City and leveraged her position as top secretarial science student in her class to land a job working for an executive at Standard Brands in Manhattan. And there she was, in New York City, with her beautiful dark hair and red lipstick, when Dick, whom she knew from Ole Miss, wrote her a letter asking for a date when he was in town. He almost missed out because, funny man that he was, Gerry thought Dick’s invitation, dated April 1, might be a joke. Luckily for all, she eventually married him and he spent the next fifty-four years making her laugh.Though Gerry’s ready advice to others might have been along the lines of, “try not to do everything all at once,” she never adhered to that herself. She always had several books going and her curiosity was endless: about the world, about people, about what might happen next. While raising her three children with Dick in Memphis in the 1970s, Gerry concluded that she would like to add a demanding career, and she dove into graduate studies in psychology at Memphis State University. She earned her PhD in 1984, and was licensed as both a school psychologist and later as a clinical psychologist. During the course of her studies, Gerry worked in her field, managed the many details of the family, and never let the freezer run low on ice cream. She navigated this journey the way all busy mothers do, with pre-dawn grocery shopping and late-night studying, but she did it with such grace and humor, and she was so successful, that she made it look almost easy. Her children teased her for years about the time she called out to her youngest son while she was racing down the hallway: “John, go sit on my lap, I’ll be there in a minute!”Gerry loved her work as a psychologist, and in the course of her career she made dear, lifelong friends and had many successes. She eventually earned her way to a top administrative position in the school system and retired as the Director of the Memphis City Schools Mental Health Center in 1996. She was viewed as a strong and efficient administrator, and in this role, never stepped away from a challenge.Upon their early retirement, Gerry and Dick decided to have a great adventure and, fearlessly, Gerry picked up her life to move to the beach in Bandon, Oregon. They loved the beach but eventually found a beautiful spot inland, on the Umpqua River near Elkton, Oregon, where they built a home, made many new friends, and found new hobbies. Gerry’s energy and can-do attitude went into endless gardening, ever-more-complicated knitting projects, and the non-stop process of learning that defined her life. She would find something interesting in her reading and sure enough, a trip would be planned to explore.Between her travels with Dick, Gerry’s schedule was full of book club meetings, knitting groups, and volunteer shifts at the community center. Gerry’s Elkton friends, like the friends she made everywhere through her life, truly adored her. Her favorite local restaurant always had the special seedless jam she liked set aside for her, and she delighted in gathering there with her friends for weekend morning breakfasts. Dick and Gerry spent twenty years in Oregon before returning home to Memphis in 2016, where they were able to spend time with family and many old and dear friends.Probably because Gerry was committed to maximizing every moment of her life, she was always an impressive early adopter of technology. She had one of the earliest home computers in the 1980s, and she was very proud of her fancy built-in “carphone” that got a workout every time she started the ignition in the 90s. She never went anywhere without her kindle. There never was a person who more loved the power of her modern smart phone to look up every question, store her beloved photos, and reach out immediately to every friend. Most people really shouldn’t try to do everything at once, but Gerry really could, and beautifully did.Although Gerry was impacted by illness during the final years of her life, her ambitious spirit was not diminished. In the final year of her life, she was still determined to travel and had Dick by her side on trips to both the West and East coasts to visit people she loved.Gerry will be remembered as a wife who was deeply and truly loved; as an accomplished professional; and as a treasured friend. She will be remembered as a dispenser of wise advice, most commonly begun and ended with, “you have options.” She will be remembered as an asker of questions and a finder of answers. She will be remembered as a person who could find new friends on an airplane or in a waiting room, while always maintaining devoted old friends with her loyalty, her warmth, and her ability to listen. She will be remembered most fondly sitting in her rocking chair or on her porch swing, long legs stretched out, with the work of the moment in her lap — her schoolbooks, her novel, her knitting, her laptop computer, or her bowl of peppermint ice cream.Gerry is survived by her brother Russell Tarver, her children Richard, Anne, and John, and her six beloved grandchildren. There will be a service for family and close friends at St. John’s Episcopal Church in Memphis at 2 p.m. on Friday, July 12. Memorial Park Funeral Home & Cemetery is handling arrangements. Donations in Gerry’s honor may be made to St. Jude Children’s Research Hospital in Memphis.Arrangements have been entrusted to Memorial Park Funeral Home and Cemetery, 5668 Poplar Ave. Memphis, TN 38119 (901) 767-8930 “A Fitting Farewell for Everyone”
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